Jimmy Carr: Arriving Early: "Actually, a couple of weeks ago, I failed to perform sexually. I'm not going to go into detail, but suffice it to say, I 'arrived early.' And my girlfriend said, 'Don't worry, that' happens to a lot of guys.' I said, 'There's two things the matter with that. Firstly, who are these 'a lot of guys,' and secondly, if it's happening to more than one of us, don't you think it could be your fault?'"
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